This Weekend’s Kind of Intense (3/27-29) + Blow Pony Celebrates 8 Years!

By Daniel Borgen, PQ Monthly

Apparently you will need to clone yourself before kicking off festivities tomorrow. (It feels like Pride already.) (Portland knows how to have a queer old time.)

Friday, March 27 

NetRippers DRAG Soccer Tourney. Dust off that lace front, tighten up your tuck, stuff in those tube socks, and slap on that stash… it’s time for some drag soccer, sweethearts! Join us Fri., March 27th @ Rose City Futsal for our 3rd annual DRAG TOURNEY EXTRAVAGANZA! Dusted, busted, or rusted… your skill level doesn’t matter. The important part is to have fun and look sick’ning. Not a soccer player? It’s OK. There will be plenty of dancing, drinking, and crazy shenanigans to keep everyone entertained. For more information and TO REGISTER OFFICIALLY: You better sissy that walk. 5pm, Rose City Futsal, 5010 NE Oregon.

Turnt Up Featuring Bomb Ass Pussy: Every 4th Friday, Turnt Up! is a dance party featuring queers and queer sentiments, performance, live music and deejays from near and far. Turnt says: We wish to create a space to free ourselves of constraints through art and dance music that pushes boundaries, while maintaining that essential element called: FUN. We believe the night is for us, you, me and each other. We create space for all sexualities, body types, ages, genders, class backgrounds and ethnicities. In and of itself, we believe this to be a potentially radical act and invite you to help contribute.

B.A.P. Info: Transplants from Los Angeles, transplants from drag, transplants from another planet of fierce queer creatures—the trio Bomb Ass Pussy tells stories of queer identity and celebration through hip hop. Their music is raw and visceral—drawing influence from all the great rapstresses with the reading of real radical feminism. 9:30pm, Lovecraft, 421 SE Grand. $5.

Strip the Light Fantastic…into the night and back we go, featuring a striptease showcase focusing on the bright things in the dark. NEON//BLACKLIGHT//FLUORESCENTS. Featuring a cast of strip-teasers handpicked by Zora Phoenix. In the warm dark of Crush’s inviting showroom, you’ll be ‘raving’ about the delicious drink specials and invited to glow crazy over the full menu of eats, including vegan & vegetarian options. 8pm, Crush, 1400 SE Morrison.

Twerk. DJs ILL Camino and II Trill. Keywords: bring your twerk. The city’s longest-running queer hip hop/R&B party–where artists, deejays, performers come to mix, mingle, and move on the dance floor. Established fun, all night long. 9pm, Local Lounge, 3536 NE MLK. $5.

Saturday, March 28 

HER HRC Portland: She Brew. Come celebrate Women’s History Month with the intoxicating combination of empowered women and fabulous homebrewed beer, all to benefit the LGBT community! Her HRC (Human Rights Campaign), along with the Ladies of Lager and Ales (LOLA), are delighted to announce the second annual She Brew Festival. This year’s She Brew, a gathering of women and allies to foster community and ignite action in the LGBT civil rights movement, will be held at Portland’s own Jupiter Hotel.
Contrary to the perception of beer as a historically male beverage, the link between women and beer brewing was forged over a millennia ago—after all, Ninkasi was the ancient Sumerian goddess of beer! In the grand tradition of Martha Jefferson (that’s right, Thomas’ wife), Oregon and SW Washington’s finest female homebrewers team with Her HRC for this unique beer tasting event, featuring samples from assorted local craft brewers and a special judging for the homebrew competition. After the tasting you’ll vote on your favorite lady’s homebrew, awarding a winner the opportunity to brew on a commercial system and the coveted She Brew Stein.

So join LOLA and Her HRC on Saturday, March 28th from noon to 8pm at the Jupiter Hotel Courtyard and Dream Box to learn more about the history of women in brewing and the critical work of the Human Rights Campaign as we continue 2015. Tickets available online or at the door. She Brew is open to and welcomes EVERYONE 21 and Over.

Heavenly Creatures, a celebration of the weird queer beauty of Portland. Get yr freak number set right. Ugly is the new pretty. Pretty is boring. Heavenly creatures is what we are. Sounds like…heaven? Hosted by House of St. Darling, Music by Mother’s Day (DJ Sappho + Roy G Biv), Gogos, Fortunes, Door Feme Dudes, and much, much more. The party is $5 and doors at 9pm. This charge is so artists, DJs, organizers, and photographers can be paid a living and sustainable wage for their art. Politics of the space: This is a queer and queer allies party. We are anti-racist, body-positive, sex positive, queer-as fuck freaky radicals who strive to create an environment of respect, celebration, and fun in our parties. Therefore, disrespectful, belligerent, heterosexist, misogynist, transphobic, abelist, fat phobic, racist, and/or violent behavior is not welcome and those who exhibit it will be asked to leave immediately. This event is a ONE TIME ONLY queer shindig at Dynasty, which is located at 832 N. Killingsworth. It opens this month.

The All Things Nerdy Bar Crawl: Let your NERD flag fly at this geeky bar crawl. Come in Cosplay, sexy nerd ensemble, or even your favorite Star Trek or Dr. Who shirt, anything goes. Raffle Prizes along the way and special dweeby drinks at each stop. Scandals Pdx, CC Slaughters Portland, and Silverado. A benefit for AIDS Walk Portland. 7pm, Scandals, 1125 SW Stark.

Blow Pony’s EIGHTH Anniversary Celebration. From the party planners: Mark your calendars, get your hair done, clean out those holes. We’re gonna ride real hard on this one. For 8 years we’ve been setting fires and fanning flames of the HOMO AGENDA! Let this night be no different. In this time our stages have hosted over 100 Queer artist from across the country and abroad, Artist like Leslie Hall, Hi Fashion, Double Duchess, SSION, Heklina, Peaches Christ, CHRISTEENE, Bruce LaBruce, Raja Gemini, Delta Work, Tammie Brown, and many many more. This Sissy Saddle up has been riding long and hard because of its supporters, lovers, family and friends, this means you! We all thank you and love you for the 8years of total QUEERUPTION! 9pm, Rotture/Branx, 315 SE Third. $5.

Judy on Duty. Lesbian hardcore. Judys, Judes, and cool ass freaks. Dance it out. DJ Troubled Youth. Organized by Ana Margarita and Megan Holmes. 10pm, High Mark Water Lounge, 6800 NE MLK.

Sunday, March 29

Superstar Divas. Bolivia Carmichaels, Honey Bea Hart, Topaz Crawford, Isaiah Tillman, and guest stars perform your favorite pop, Broadway, R&B, rock, and country hits. Dance floor opens after the show. The Drag Queen Hunger Games are over, and the shows must go on! Check out the newest and freshest Diva hits. 8pm, CC Slaughters, 219 NW Davis. Free