The Long Journey Home

Leela G. ID Check

By Leela Ginelle, PQ Monthly

Prior to remembering the abuse from my childhood I’d repressed, I avoided stories about mental illness. Films in which characters lost their minds, struggling to understand what was real and what was the product of delusion …

Trans People Were Never Cis

Leela G. ID Check

By Leela Ginelle, PQ Monthly

There’s a trope present in certain lesbian feminist circles, aimed at discrediting trans women, which claims we, as a group, prior to transitioning, enjoyed “male privilege.” Those who argue this often claim that we bring “residual …

Finding True Community at Pride

Leela G. ID Check

By Leela Ginelle, PQ Monthly

In writing, I use the term “community” seemingly all the time in reference to trans* people, or, more broadly, LGBTQ people. Since I seem so often to be arguing for equality or against discrimination when I …

Measuring Progress and Pain

Leela G. ID Check

By Leela Ginelle, PQ Monthly

Recently, while I walked past a group of teenagers, one called out to my back, “Oh my god—that’s a guy!” Her tone was hysterical, and elicited a similar response from her friends.

I ignored them. While unpleasant, …

Trans Bodies, Cis Words

Leela G. ID Check

By Leela Ginelle, PQ Monthly

When my transition began, I believed it was incumbent on me to “pass” the moment I stepped outside. Having been raised with unquestioned cissexism, cis male and cis female were the only genders I considered valid.

My …

The Horrors Denial Permits

Leela G. ID Check

By Leela Ginelle, PQ Monthly

Our culture practices an unspoken agreement that what happens in people’s homes is their business. This agreement, unfortunately, results in huge numbers of perpetrators and survivors — mammoth amounts of domestic abuse, sexual assault, torture, etc.

Domestic …

Trans Exclusion in Portland

Leela G. ID Check

By Leela Ginelle, PQ Monthly

At Q Center’s second Town Hall meeting, an attendee stood, identified herself as a “woman born woman” and requested space to meet exclusively with other women who identify as she does. Hearing her, I, and the …

I Was Patriarchy’s Target

Leela G. ID Check

By Leela Ginelle, PQ Monthly

Early in my transition I began expressing my gender visually. I wore makeup, jewelry, and feminine clothing. It was in this period, prior to starting hormones or beginning to remove my facial hair, that people felt …

Removing the Past from the Present

Leela G. ID Check

By Leela Ginelle, PQ Monthly

Recovering from repressed trauma and transitioning were similar experiences, in that both involved integrating of parts of myself which had been sealed off. For the last four years flux has been my normal state, adjusting to …

Keep Your Binary Off My Gender

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By Leela Ginelle, PQ Monthly

When one has experienced an erroneous gender assignment, and then had to live with it, suffering a traumatic puberty; when one has fought the perception that their gender is somehow inauthentic, and has seen their identity …