Hilton Caves, Issues Statement Apologizing For/Explaining Her Gay Rant

It’s been a week of about-faces, damage control, and apologies.

Yesterday, national idiot treasure Paris Hilton spent her day trying to explain away these enlightened comments, which were allegedly recorded by a cab driver in New York City. (Paris is real good at not realizing the cameras are rolling.) Her comments went something like this: “Ewww. Eww. To get f**ked? Gay guys are the horniest people in the world. They’re disgusting. Dude, most of them probably have AIDS…I would be so scared if I was a gay guy. You’ll like, die of AIDS.”

Yes, “die of AIDS.”

So, yeah, as if that statement isn’t appalling enough in and of itself, her PR tried to explain it away as a lesson on safe sex. That’s a real thing. “Paris Hilton’s comments were to express that it is dangerous for anyone to have unprotected sex that could lead to a life threatening disease.” There’s more, but that’s the gist of it. So basically our beloved reality star–who’s made a “career” of doing nothing–was just trying to educate us! We should be grateful. And feel more educated. That a person of her stature would take the time to teach us about safe sex!

As one would expect, the fury of a thousand gay hells descended upon sweet Paris–even more after that inane comment from her rep–and she’s set out again to make things right. The full apology, below, from The Advocate:

“As anyone close to me knows, I always have been and always will be a huge supporter of the gay community. I am so sorry and so upset that I caused pain to my gay friends, fans and their families with the comments heard this morning. I was having this private conversation with a friend of mine who is gay and our conversation was in no way towards the entire gay community. It is the last thing that I would ever want to do and I cannot put into words how much I wish I could take back every word.

HIV/AIDS can hurt anyone, gay and straight, men and women. It’s something I take very seriously and should not have been thrown around in conversation.

Gay people are the strongest and most inspiring people I know. It is so wrong when people bully or put down others for being gay. No one should have to go through that. Again, I am so sorry from the bottom of my heart and I feel absolutely horrible. I hope that everyone can accept my apology and know that it is not who I am or how I feel in any way.”

See, she cares! Bullying is bad, too.

No doubt she has plenty of gay friends–and perhaps it was just a stupid, careless (perhaps drunken) one-off. Or maybe it was a case of someone’s true form coming out to play–and she’s just sorry she got caught. Hard to say, especially when it comes to someone who’s spent her entire life simply keeping up appearances. At least she confirmed this: she’s officially the most appalling person on the planet.

At least we’ll always have her beautiful musics: