By Suzanne Deakins, PQ Monthly

Devastation, heartbreaking, tears, and deep disappointed only begin to describe what we are all feeling in our community. Distance does not matter, what happens to one happens to us all.

As we search our hearts and minds trying to understand such a hateful act, we may want to point our finger and try to reason why. Hate, killing, and violence has no reason and no logic to it. Part of our pain is trying to understand something that seems so illogical. Seeking safety in our minds, we think if we can find an answer we will be safe. To hate enough to kill or mane is not a reality that most of us can comprehend.

This act of violence is not an action ever condoned by any religious sects. It has nothing to do with being a Christian or a Muslim. This was an act of self-loathing, fear, and mental illness. Religion plays no part in acts of violence. Acts of violence that are perpetrated in the name of God, Mohamed or not spoken as in Eloyem are not religious acts, but rather acts of individuals who are full of fear and self-loathing. When the mind of an individual sleeps in fear of his or her emotions and longings, it reacts with hate and violence.

What is needed now is an extraordinary approach to mind and consciousness that allows us to view our past and future from our current position? I do not know the solution to the hate and violence perpetrated on our brothers and sisters in Florida. I am aware that the sick consciousness of an individual was the progenitor of the situation and therefore must contain the answer to the problems at hand. Like all problems, the answer is contained within the problem itself.

Unlike the governor of Texas who quoted as saying what you sow NO, I mean NO religious leader condones this type of violence and hate. We are at a time of watershed in our history. This is a time when all religions have supported the right to freedom beyond their ideas about our lifestyles. Yes, they may not agree with our life, but they have NOT sought to kill and destroy us. Every congregation in Portland stands with us in our sorrow and grief over this terrible time in Florida.

Any of us with a smidgen of conscious awareness are cognizant that violence doesn’t solve the problem of violence. The violence and terrorism are not situated within any one group or person but rather in the collective consciousness. In the herd consciousness, we find the need for separateness and destruction. The question of survival in herd consciousness deals with dominance, power, and control of food sources and territory. The very word terror shares a root word with the territory. This in itself is a hint to what terrorism is really about.

It is my experience any place in our private and public lives that contains violence, terror, and trauma is a place of contradiction. A paradox is a place where in great leaps in awareness may be accomplished. An experience of metanoia (a significant change in mind/thinking) and the Buddhist concept of the “tulpas” (thought form) can happen while contemplating profound duplicity. Paradoxes hold both the problems and the answers.

Devastation IMGHow can an act of violence preserve peace? How can power bring power under control? Two opposing and contradictory concepts, duplicity, we use force to achieve peace and yet violence is the very deed that breaks the peace. In the study of consciousness, we find those places in our personal lives where we have an opportunity to understand the true meaning of power and control by examining the repulsion and addiction to violence and terror. We search for the contradictions in our thinking, beliefs, and actions.

For me, the real question/problem becomes one of consciousness. How do I personally work with my knowledge to affect the whole of the collective unconscious? Where and what is the paradox? And what do the riddles mean in this situation at a global and personal levels?

Ordinary answers don’t seem to satisfy the push I feel of mind unfolding. A small, intuitive whisper keeps whispering, “go further and understand more.” The violence of terrorism has only one answer in my thinking, and that is one of consciousness. What is your intuition telling you? Is there a whisper to go further, understand more at this point in your life? I do believe that as we clear our consciousness we establish the basis for world peace…for peace and love in our GLBT family. Like the ants, each of us plays a part in the collective consciousness.

We are not outside of the collective consciousness nor are we totally defined by it. Our being and consciousness are a matter of our viewpoint, how we see and experience life. Do we add to the world terrorism by our ego needs of greed and power? Are we capable of loving even the dirtiest faced child and the worst offender of peace? Is it possible to love those who lie to us and take us to places that we don’t want to go?

Peace and the answers to gaining a lasting peace are the seeds in each of our consciousness. Listen to that intuitive voice… go further, understand, and give more. Only through inner work does it seem possible to gain the peace we all seek. There is no ONE answer but an answer in ONE and understanding we are of one spirit, one force, one higher mind, truth, God, and LOVE.

Stand tall and let your rainbow flag fly for LOVE, compassion, and consciousness for it is this that will make us stronger and less fearful.